If the shoe doesn’t fit....

Well that escalated quickly. My husband and I started having a conversation about politics and that conversation lead to another conversation about being uncomfortable. I may not be passionate about politics but I am passionate about reminding myself and teaching others to never sacrifice their comfort level in a situation.

We aren’t meant to fit in everywhere. That is why every single part of who we are is unique. There will never be another you. We can’t conform into what others find comfortable and that is ok.

I believe that we have been taught for many many years that we need to try and fit in. “Don’t cause a scene. Don’t stir anything up. Don’t make yourself stand out. Sit there, be quiet and be happy you have the opportunity” or maybe the script of your life sounded like this “Nothing is ever good enough for you. You are never happy. You always need more. When are you ever going to be satisfied?”

Does any of this sound familiar? If so, the answer is 𝓷𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓻 . The answer is:

“I am never going to force myself to fit in where I am not comfortable”

Now, I want to warn you, this can be emotional as you start to realize all of the places that you don’t feel comfortable. Maybe it’s your long time job, maybe it is in your very own family or with your long time friend group. Wherever It is, giving yourself the full love and honor of no longer trying to fit where you aren’t meant to fit is one of the fullest ways that you can become everything you are meant to become. It is one of the best ways to show yourself self love.

We teach our children to listen to their gut. We tell them “If something doesn’t feel right then leave right away” and “If you don’t feel comfortable, don’t stay”… right? So when did we stop that? When did we fade into a life where we suddenly find ourselves worrying about offending someone else when we aren’t comfortable? Let’s take that right back. It’s our one and only life and we should never have to try and fit in somewhere where we aren’t meant to fit.

Now, I do want to say, please don’t confuse this with being uncomfortable when trying something new. Of course there are going to be obstacles and new challenges that don’t feel comfortable AT FIRST. These things will be easily identifiable because they start out a bit awkward and uncomfortable but quickly become exciting and will feel really good. There should be a nervous but fun energy buzzing around you… not a warning energy. Pay close attention to this and listen to your cues.

I hope we can all walk forward in 2021 with a new outlook on what makes us feel good and what makes us feel bad and becoming strong enough to only accept what feels good. I also hope that you never again stay in an uncomfortable situation just because you don’t think that you are allowed to leave it. Just like we should never force a nut and bolt or our bodies into a piece of clothing that is too small ( someday I will share my terrifying story of when I got stuck in a shirt in a Kohl’s dressing room) we shouldn’t force ourselves into fitting where we are uncomfortable in any situation.

Here’s to many days of landing where you feel your best!

𝒳𝒪𝒥𝑀